Home > Life's Stories... > Everyone should have a sense of humor….. :)

Everyone should have a sense of humor….. :)

I tried this at home!!!!

Mom, Dad I am sorry…..

Disclaimer: The post tells you some Dark Secrets. Weak-Hearted members must first get a Doctor’s certificate to enter the post. Any damage to any member’s brain and heart wont be entertained later on. The post is a serious one. No fun intended. Any resemblance to any person Living or Dead is purely intentional.

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Dad trying to get me married and have kids:

Dad: I love you. You’re the best thing that ever happened to me. Taking care of you when you were small was the best feeling ever!!
Me: I’m the best thing that’s ever happened to you?
Dad: Yes.
Me: That’s sad!!!!! (He wasn’t amused…)

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Mom: You are driving too fast…
Me: No! It’s the trees, they are running too fast….

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

I am sleeping…..

Dad: (Wakes me up…) Are you sleeping!
Me: No I was running the cross-country race… Could you please get me some Gatorade…
(I don’t think he quite got what I meant…)

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Dad: I told you not to ride a bike… (I had a major accident…)
Dad: I told you not to go out at night… (Got in trouble with cops…)
Dad: I told you not to get involved with women… (Had a streak of bad relationships…)
Dad: I told you not to drive to fast… (Almost totaled my car twice…)
Dad: I told you not to deep sea surfing… (Almost drowned…)
Dad: I told you not to keep your windows open… (Caught a cold…)

Me: Dad please stop telling me what not to do…
Dad: Blank face?????

Me: I think you are bad luck…. (He was Not Amused…)

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

(This seriously happened…)
At school my Headmaster told me to tell our folks that we love them a lot!!!!
10 years later … I am sitting alone in my crib… I remember what he said so….

Speed Dial: (Dad)
… Telephone Rings …

Dad: Hello
Me: Hay pops it’s me!
Dad: Had your dinner…
Me: ummmm…. No…. I miss you Dad … Love you…
Dad: Did you kill someone???
Me: ????? (Thinking!!! WTF ….) No dad…
Dad: Did you have an accident???
Me: ????? (Thinking!!! WTF ….) No dad…
Dad: Have you started taking drugs???
Me: ????? (Thinking!!! Seriously WTF ….) No dad…
Dad: Do you need money???
Me: ????? (Thinking!!! WTF ….) No dad…
Me: Good Night dad…..
Dad: Abhi……. (Click!!!!)

(I think: I am never doing that again!!!!)

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Ok I find this very funny…
My dad wanted me to study History as a subject so I told him….

Me: Dad you want me to take History …. I find it boring and uninteresting…
Dad: That’s not the case…
Me: Oh yes it is… When you were my age History was Current Affairs so, that’s why you like it so much…. (NOT AT ALL AMUSED…. I WAS BLASTED OFF TO THE MOON….)

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Dad: In our times, we had only two pairs of trousers, and two pairs of shirts…
Me: Dad I also have two pairs of trousers and two pairs of shirts…
……….rest are Jeans, Tees, Cargos….. LOL

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

My Mum’s Friends: You should get married Abhishek, it’s your time, You are next…
Me: (I looked deep down in her eyes and said)… “I can’t tolerate women…” (She fell off the chair… I felt she knew I was talking about her…. ROFL)

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Old Woman: Abhi… “You are next…” Getting married soon huh!
Me: Yeah… (Actually Nooooo…..)
Me: Aunty I heard about your sister passing away… very sad…
Old Woman: Yeah well it was her time….
Me: (In my head….. “YOU ARE NEXT!!!” …. YOU FU*&$IN BITCH!!!)

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

(When I was 16… :P)

Mom: Where were you?
Me: Went to meet my girlfriend…
Mom: Kiss Liye? (In Hindi …. Why?)
Me: Lots… (She did not catch the vibe….)
Mom: Kiss Liye? (In Hindi …. Why?)
Me: To have coffee….

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Career Advice:

Mom: I want you to have everything in life….
Me: ……… ?
Me: Where would I put all those things….

ROFL!!!!

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* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Laughter is the shock absorber that eases the blows of life…
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Will add more as I remember them or when they happen… You have some share below…
Peace out friends…. Love you all….. πŸ™‚

PS: Time to go study now 😦

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Categories: Life's Stories... Tags: ,
  1. rik2611
    March 14, 2011 at 11:35 PM

    sum of them r cool ,few look copied..and few made me laugh …u shud write more.

    • March 17, 2011 at 11:42 AM

      πŸ™‚ Thanks bro… But all of these I did do to my folks verbatim, over a period of time, maybe some I must have picked up on the way, but Copying (Just to write the post…) I did not do πŸ™‚ ….

  2. March 15, 2011 at 11:02 AM

    πŸ™‚

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